"They call it the "Quarter-Life Crisis". It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or sincere, but that they are as confused as you. You look at your job...and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom that scares you. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in you life and are constantly adding things to you list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward. You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself...and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender! What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out."
This is supposedly the time that we are still filled with motivation, excitement about life, dreams of becoming everything we hope to become. We have not been completely worn down yet by repeated disappointment, and accomplishing goals is terrifying, but still possible (in our eyes). We know we're still young. We spend out childhoods trying to grow up, spend out later lives trying to remain young. Still, the Quarter-Life Crisis seems inevitable. We all seem to be a bit scared no matter what we do, and what's even more terrifying is that we're starting to realize that this fear we're experiencing doesn't end. This is the beginning of being afraid about everything and for everyone. This doesn't mean that our lives are ruined, but it means that happiness is not something we can achieve like we thought. We thought we could get a job, get a spouse, have a kid or two, get a house with a lawn, and then it would be done. We'd fall into a routine that we liked, and we would remain completely fulfilled. I have to admit, though I know it's stupid, I still actually believe this with my whole heart. My brain knows better, but my heart thinks that there will be a day that comes that I will stop worrying, and I will spend 50 years after that feeling pretty damn good about my life. I think this separation between brain and heart is the essence of being 20-something. It is finally knowing something, but not choosing to believe it...not just yet.
